I went to the supermarket last night to get some food for my dogs, Max and Murphy. As much as I’d like to think of them as the fearless protectors of Quesada Manor, I know deep down if I were ever being burlarized they would probably hold the door open while the thieves carried out my big screen. Even though they are wimps, the law says I still have to feed them.
Anyway, as I walked into the supermarket, I was reminded of the time of year it is. Giant heart shaped candy boxes and stuffed animals bombarding me left and right. It’s a time when men spend loads of money to remind their girls that they care about them. A time when single women wallow in self-pity while finishing off a gallon of Bluebell and watching reruns of Sex and the City. A time when single men rejoice, and laugh at other men in relationships. Oh yes. It’s Valentine’s Day. A day that I’m not a big fan of for plenty of reasons. Reasons I’ll be sure to explain next week.
On the positive side, this is really the last of the holidays I have to worry about for a while. I can finally start saving money again after this one. You see, I have family that starts having birthdays begining in September. One month after another. It wraps up with my little sister’s birthday in February. And since I like to splurge on gifts, it takes some time to “rebuild the financial empire”, if you know what I mean. So I see the light at the end of the Holiday tunnel.
In the spirit of St. Valentine’s, I found a couple of well used websites for this time of year that I’d like to share with you all. The people at Infidelity.com will follow your significant other around and gather evidence if they are being unfaithful or not, for a nominal fee. They are no doubt making a killing this time of year! And so is The Alibi Network. These guys help you with your infidelity. For example, if you tell your husband or wife that you need to go out of town on business, they will help provide you with the proof to support your claim of where you were. At least, that’s how I understand it.
So you have two resources here. One to help you cheat, the other to catch you cheating. And people say there’s no such thing as love…
-Dave Q.
only you dave….only you.
Why do I feel like some intensive therapy is in order?
Seriously – Olga hasn’t really been that good of a girl this year, so I wouldn’t go over board or anything
This is cool dave! A link for would-be cheaters and for those suspecting that their partners are cheating.Love your dog too!