Where do I start…

I went to Spain and Portugal for 10 days. Guess what? The airline lost my luggage. I don’t know who exactly is at fault, but either Continental or Air France really screwed the pooch on this one. As I type this, neither one can tell me where the luggage is. Way to go, assholes.

This forced my hand into buying clothes over there. Let me tell you something about European clothes: They are expensive as hell and ugly as sin. So time that I had planned for exploring and leisure had to be used for shopping. And dear Lord do I hate shopping! So I fully plan on getting reimbursed for all the jacked up clothes I had to buy there. And they better give me some compensation for losing my luggage. My favorite pair of flip-flops were in there. And to me those were priceless.

The hotels on the trip sucked. Small rooms. Smaller bathrooms. No irons? Please. So not only were the euro-clothes crappy, but I couldn’t iron them. Seriously folks. No irons. And these were 4 star hotels, allegedly. They must be buying their hotel ratings from the same guys peddling bootleg copies of Transformers and Shrek 3 on the streets there.

I couldn’t believe how rude the Portugese are. I hope the small group of them I encountered don’t accurately represent the majority. Those bastards would ignore or look right though you if you asked them a question.  The French people I encountered were more pleasant.  Imagine that.

It wasn’t a total loss.  I did see some cool stuff on the trip. There is no denying that. And I did meet some cool people as well. I met some Aussies, some Brits, some Canucks. And they all helped me drink away the anger on a couple of nights. So I guess the trip wasn’t a total loss. Just lots of frustrations on our end.

One last note. I just heard that the luggage has been located by Air France. It’s in London. Motherf&%$rs!!!!

-Dave Q.

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  • I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is that they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff. Then, when somebody comes up, they act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?!"