Archive for May, 2007

So while running the bases between second and third on a pop up to Blue Jays third basemen Howie Clark, Alex Rodriguez of the Evil Empire (Yankees) shouts “Mine!” as he runs by. This causes Clark to think his teammate, shortstop John McDonald, is calling him off to make the play. The end result? The ball falls between the two Blue Jays and the Yankees end up winning the game. More controversy for A-Rod. Nothing new to this Jack-Ass.

Busted

 

I remember when this sort of thing was done on a regular basis. It was called Little League. And it actually still happens today, in beer league softball games. What kind of tool do you have to be to do something like this as a major leaguer? Then I remember A-Rod and his pathetic attempt to “slap” the ball out of the glove of Boston’s Bronson Arroyo a couple years back in the playoffs. A slap my 86 year-old grandmother called “gay”.

Glove Slap!

But I guess if you’ve been caught in the papers with another woman and your wife is probably talking to divorce lawyers right now, then what the baseball community thinks of you is the least of your problems.

-Dave Q.

Rosie O’Donnell and Elisabeth Hasselback threw down yesterday on the show they host. It’s called “The View”. Apparently it’s been on the air for a few years? I don’t know. However, I can’t help but be curious. Maybe someone can answer this question: Is this show always like this? Check out the fireworks below.


This is actually pretty entertaining. Both O’Donnell and Hasselbeck are spitting some serious venom at each other. And surprisingly, both make some valid points. So who won this catfight? Hmmmmmm. Tough call. I have heard little blips through the media that O’Donnell likes to beat up on Hasselbeck, but little Elisabeth seemed to hold her own in the arguement. So I can’t really determine a winner based on their debating skills. We’ll have to call it a tie. And we all know what that means… Sudden Death!!!

In the world of The Quesada Chronicles, we’ll determine a winner based on looks. And although it’s close…. Hasselbeck wins by a colossul landslide and delivers a beating so severe to O’Donnell that Rosie now looks to Donald Trump for support. And also now she likes men. That’s a pretty bad beating. Winner -> Hasselbeck!

Now I don’t want to brag, but I’ve been dabbling with Photoshop 7.0 quite a bit lately. And I got to thinking about that Conan O’Brien bit where they get two celebrities and ask the question, “What if they mated?”, and then morph their pictures together to get some hillarious results. So I morphed these two lovely ladies together with Photoshop and I have to say I’m pretty proud of the result. What do you think?

 

Basically I took Rosie and put Elisabeth’s hair on her. Believe it or not, I am self trained in Photoshop.

-Dave Q.

 

Not only is Marvel Comics responsible for some of the greatest superhero characters history has ever known, but they are also responsible for this!

This, boys and girls, is a statuette of Mary Jane Watson, Spider-Man’s love interest.  Marvel just released this and one can be yours for a mere $124!  It depicts Mary Jane wearing what I’m sure is the usual attire for all women when they wash their man’s “work clothes”.  Does this seem a little sexist to you?  Naaaaaaaahhhhhhh!

I just have to laugh at this.  Most guys that get engulfed with comic book stuff to the point that they eat, sleep, and breathe Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, X-Men, etc., are usually overweight, pathetic individuals living in a fantasy world that have never even seen a real girl in her panties.  So you know somehow one of those guys is responsible for producing this.  Can you imagine all those losers jumping for joy with the thought that they get to grope a little figurine of Mary Jane Watson with her pink thong showing?  By the way, check out that rack!  You think those are real?

No way they're real!

This is a true story.  My little sister actually dated one of these comic book losers back in the day.  I think his name was Ted.  Anyway, I remember Ted boasting about how he and his brother had a collection of Star Wars toys that was valued somewhere in the neighborhood of $40,000.  I have no doubt that dude is still a virgin today.  And living in his parent’s basement.

-Dave Q.

I have to enjoy this since who knows how much longer the San Antonio Spurs can maintain this level of success. They are getting older. So the Western Conference Finals start today, with the Spurs facing the Utah Jazz.

It is sweet for the simple fact that both the Dallas Mavericks and Phoenix Suns are hailed as being superior teams to the Spurs. Yet, in the words of Kenny Smith, both teams have already “gone fishin’” for the playoffs. For those that don’t watch Inside the NBA on TNT, that means they’ve been eliminated. I love that. :)

Go Spurs Go!

-Dave Q.

Ok. No more traveling… for 2 months. Things went pretty fast in Costa Rica. I didn’t have a whole lot of time to do much, but that was cool since I spent it all with family. My reason for the trip was to attend my cousin’s wedding. So with such a big occasion I got to see most, if not all my family there. Occasions like that are rare for me, so I enjoyed it.

Evelyn & Me

Not to get all sappy or anything, but there is a special place in my heart for my cousin, Evelyn. I didn’t grow up with cousins all around, since they were all in Costa Rica and I grew up in the states. But whenever I would meet up with her, she made me feel welcome and always put up with the bad Spanish I spoke. I can only imagine how annoying it must have been for her to commmunicate with me. As for her as a person, you won’t find many people out there with a bigger heart. I am thrilled that she and her new husband Frank are starting a new life together. And I’m glad I was there to see the ceremony. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.

Cerveza!

I was able to bring back a few things. Namely some cigars and Costa Rican beer called Imperial. But when you say Imperial, say it with some latin flavor. Sound it out like, Im-pur-ee-all! I think it’s good and I’m not a huge drinker. But my buddy Jay is. His family is from Shiner, TX. Home of the Shiner brewery, and he loves the Imperial beer. So someone who knows his beer likes it. And trust me when I tell you, Jay knows his beer. So It must be good! Anyway I brought over some. So let’s see: Costa Rican Cigars. Cuban cigars. Costa Rican Beer. How do you say “poker night” in Spanish?

-Dave Q.

And just for the hell of it, here is a link with reviews on Costa Rican beer. Kind of old, though. http://www.realbeer.com/nmvbp/rev_cr.htm

For the record, anyone out there can produce a video like this about any team in the NBA. It’s just part of the game. I am forced to post this because of the nauseating love affair the media and basketball world is having with the Phoenix Suns right now and showing the Spurs as villains.


You shouldn’t be surprised. It’s playoff basketball. And the Suns are doing what they need to do to win. Until a ref blows a whistle to stop it, why should they? But like I said, anyone out there can make a video showing the Spurs doing some acting jobs and committing hard fouls. So that’s that. Hopefully the series ends tonight.

-Dave Q.

Hola. I haven’t had much time or sleep since I got back from Costa Rica. I blame that on work and the Spurs vs. Suns. Can you believe this series? Damn! My Spurs have been made public enemy number #1 by the media. Never in my life did I ever think I would hear the Spurs be called a “dirty” team. And when a player gets upset at the Spurs and starts making accusations, it’s usually because the Spurs are playing tough defense. And then you mention flopping? As much as I love Manu Ginobili, I will admit that he flops at times. And I hate that part of his game. But I’ll be damned if I haven’t seen Raja Bell and Steve Nash (particularly when Horry hip checked him) doing some horrible acting jobs. They get breathed on and then fall over. Come on. Case in point, watch Nash as he over sells this foul. Even Shaq can be heard saying that he wasn’t fouled that hard. And we all know that Shaq isn’t the shiniest penny in the fountain, if you know what I mean. In fact, you can blame the suspensions of Stoudemire and Diaw on Nash. If he doesn’t flop, then they don’t run over to hisdefend him.


Anyway, the Spurs aren’t dirty. Ginobili and Horry aren’t dirty. And Bruce Bowen is not dirty. Anyone that says that doesn’t know anything about basketball. Period. And for all those of you that disagree? First, go to hell. Second, learn from Lindsay Douglas. Not only does she know more about sports than you, she has a great pair of… eyes.


-Dave Q.

I’m back from Costa Rica!  And I desperately need to catch up on sleep.  I will be posting some pics tomorrow.

-Dave Q.

May 2007
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  • Like jewels in a crown, the precious stones glittered in the queen's round metal hat.