Last night was the Oscars. Or, as I’d like to put it, Super Bowl Sunday for women and hippies. I did not watch it due to my strict policy against watching any television or movies that may possibly make me dumber. However, I would make an exception if I were guaranteed seeing Halle Berry all night instead of Ellen Degeneres. But not until then. So since I didn’t actually see the awards, I can’t really comment on them. But feel free to fill me in!


The GORGEOUS Halle Berry

So, I heard this thing lasted nearly 4 hours?! Wow. Did any of you sit through this? I also heard that Eddie Murphy and Mark Wahlberg were nominated for Oscars. I repeat, Eddie Murphy and Mark Wahlberg. And also Kelly Leak from the Bad News Bears. I guess they are just handing these nominations out now like they’re flu shots, huh? I can’t wait for mine. Do they come via UPS or FedEx?

-Dave Q.

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February 2019
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Today's Deep Thought

  • I'd like to see a nature film where an eagle swoops down and pulls a fish out of a lake, and then maybe he's flying along, low to the ground, and the fish pulls a worm out of the ground. Now that's a documentary.