Archive for the ‘Bullshit’ Category

So my iPhone 4 went belly up this morning.  All because I was trying to do the right thing and update the firmware just like the Apple “geniuses” tell me to do.  Well, it got stuck in recovery mode and never came back.  I ended up taking it to the Apple store and they decided on giving me a brand new one.  I guess they waved the white flag upon seeing it.  That’s cool.  I’ll take the brand new one.  :)

So I am now going on hour number 3 of restoring the iPhone.  I didn’t realize I had so much crap on it.  Hopefully everything gets put back on the way it was.  I am less than confident though, since these restores usually don’t go smoothly for me.  Fingers crossed!

For the record, going almost an entire day without a functional iPhone has me miserable.  I didn’t know how much she meant to me!  Baby, come back!  I can’t even take a picture of it being restored because… it’s what I would use to take a picture with.  **face palm**

-Dave Q.

Check out this beauty I got in my email inbox today.  Come on, Gmail!  Shouldn’t your spam filter be picking this stuff up?  Anyway, not only am I annoyed with receiving this authentic email from the one and only Ban Ki-moon, Secretary General of the United Nations, but I’m also somewhat insulted.  If you’re going to try and scam me, at least have the decency to use proper grammar!  That’s just plain laziness.  It’s not just incorrect grammar, it’s flat out horrendous.  I had a hard time trying to piece a couple of their sentences together.  How are you supposed to fool anyone when it’s so poorly worded?  If someone falls for this crap, I think they deserve it.

So I’m guessing they used some kind of translation software before sending out the mass spam.  With Gmail’s spam filter doing such a knock-out job, my guess is they used Google Translator.  But I can forgive this, Google, since your Google Contacts app is pretty awesome.

But back to this Mr. Ban Ki-moon and his attempt to give me money.  After I got over the annoyance of the spam, I read this beauty of a letter.  I love how it warns me of other fake spammers out there and this one is actually legit.  And they must be on the up and up if the CC’d the friggin’ FBI!  Oh yeah, and he copied Attorney General Eric Holder.  And of course, nice touch with the header including a pic of the UN.  That’s enough for me, where do I sign?

Go to hell, spammers.

-Dave Q.

Names have been changed to protect the boneheaded innocent…

I just want to share with you something that happened to a friend of mine recently.  My friend, Jake, works as a master plumber and was at a job site recently when a truck pulled up with a couple of guys.  One of them got out and asked him if he or any of his crew would be interested in buying some home theater equipment.  The guy told Jake that he was doing some work in an exclusive area of town (The Dominion for those that are familiar with San Antonio) setting up a home theater.  He then said that by accident he was sent double of each piece of equipment and that his home office wasn’t aware of this mistake, so that he wanted to unload it in a hurry.

So Jake asked to see the equipment.  They showed him the boxes that were still sealed and didn’t appear damaged.  There were boxes for speakers, a projector, a receiver, etc.  Jake saw the brand was Visionmax, which he hadn’t heard of.  That’s when he called another buddy of ours, Brent.  Jake basically told Brent that these guys were looking at selling all this equipment for $800 and asked Brent to research it online real quick to see if it was even worth that much.  Brent went on the internet, found the Visionmax website, found the model number, and saw that they sell for $4,000!  The website look legit! Damn!  Sounds like a good deal at this point, right?

So after Brent give the thumbs up to Jake, he hangs up the phone.  However, he continues to Google Visionmax.  And then he starts reading a couple of links talking about a scam.  And that’s when he reads of a scam where a guy shows up to a work site and claims to have extra home theater equipment!  WTF?!? So Brent calls back Jake multiple times and he doesn’t answer.  Finally Jake calls him back and Brent tells him “It’s a scam!  Don’t do it!”….  (silence on the other end of the phone…)  It was too late.  Jake had given the douchebags $800 for the garbage they were peddling.  A tough lesson to learn.  And we don’t speak of it.  Mainly because if his wife finds out, he’s a dead man.

Anyway, I hope this makes you aware of these scams and maybe helps you avoid a tough situation.  Not worth it.  Ask “Jake”.

-Dave Q.

With this whole mosque debate going on and about how close it could be built to Ground Zero, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about the subject.  We practice freedom of religion in this country.  We have the right to practice whatever religion we choose.  So from a legal standpoint, the mosque should be allowed to be built.  But that being said, it is an absolute slap in the face of Americans everywhere to build this.  It is the ultimate in disrespect.  And in my opinion, it is clearly being built for one purpose: to provoke us.  I think my Dad said it best when he said “They can build that Ground Zero mosque the day that Iran, Syria, Saudi Arabia, and the rest of those hard line Muslim countries allow a Christian church or Synagogue to be built without obstruction on their turf.”

While freedom of religion is “practiced” in the US, it is done within our laws.  But in a global view of things, I can’t say I’m for freedom of religion.  If freedom of religion means I have to be cool with a group who mistreats women by cutting their noses off or stoning them to death as forms of punishment, then I guess I’m against freedom of religion.  So sue me.  There is something really jacked up when a religion is cool with something as heinous as honor killings.  Screw that.  I know I’m pointing the finger at Islam, but I feel this way towards any religion that violates human rights.  That goes for the Catholic church and their child abuse scandals, as well as any cults or wackos like David Koresh.

Sexiness for everyone from Glow Berlin on Vimeo.


Anyway, I hope I’ve gotten my point across.  But one more knock against Islam.  If Islam is keeping girls like this girl in the video under wraps, then I’m even more against freedom of religion.  Not cool.

-Dave Q.

So this morning I checked my inbox and found a couple of emails from friends asking what was up with the last email I sent them.  That was a great question, since I sent no email.  But after taking a closer look at things, apparently I did send them an email.  Or at least it was generated from my Gmail account.  One that had a link for a website in it.  A website  that specialized in a little blue pill.

So let me apologize to any friends that may have received the piece of spam that proclaimed super cheap deals on viagra.  Or at least that’s what my Dad told me the email was for.  Can you imagine your Dad thinking he has just received an email from one of his kids suggesting a cheap deal on viagra?  Not cool.  I also apologize for anyone else that got that spam from my email address, since apparently whatever douchebag hacked my account went in and sent this spam to anyone and everyone I have ever emailed from that Gmail account.  That includes family, friends, friends of friends, acquaintances, people I no longer associate with anymore, companies I’ve written complaints to, etc.

So needless to say, I’ve changed my Gmail password in the hopes that it resolves the spamming crap.  However, if you did receive one of those spam emails from me and you did get a good deal on viagra, how about some props?…  No?…  Anyone?….  (crickets)

-Dave Q.

It’s no secret.  I have no love for PETA.  Anyone that knows me even just a little bit knows this much about me.  Personally, I’m an animal lover.  But I don’t hold the life of an animal above human life, and that is one of the biggest things that would never allow me to support PETA.  That, and a whole batch of other reasons.  Such as they are a bunch of hypocrites.  Also, the label “domestic terrorists” comes to mind.  The list can go on.  But instead of me ranting, I can share with you the illustration below.  This is right on target!  I hope people out there who are animal lovers realize they don’t need to support this piece of crap organization.

So, to sum it up, I despise PETA.  However, they aren’t without some redeeming qualities.  Those qualities are this, this, and this.  And that’s about it.

But then they make a nasty ad like this.  And I wish them to go to hell.  Sorry about sharing that last one, but I had to make a point.

-Dave Q.

So I went to a happy hour last night.  Which then turned into happy hours.  Having a good time, shooting pool, downing a few drinks, enjoying the company of friends, etc.  Everything you need to result in a good time!  Of course as you have a drink or two… or several more, the urge to relieve yourself hit you.  So after losing what was probably my 4th straight game of pool, to a girl, I decide it’s time to pay a visit to the men’s room.  As soon as I walk in there, I look over and think to myself, “dammit”.

I’m not a fan of bathroom attendants.  When I go to the restroom, I just want to take care of what I need to take care of and that’s that.  I don’t need anyone there to turn on the faucet for me and squirt soap in my hands.  And of course they do this and expect a tip for it.  Jeez.  Half the time I’m not even carrying cash.  When it comes to tipping a waitress or bar tender, I put it on my credit card.  I don’t want to have to ever plan for bathroom attendant tips.  I think I will boycott any bars that have bathroom attendants from here on out.  Am I the only one that is annoyed by these guys?  Do they have a female version in the ladies room??

This got me thinking about other annoying professions.  So I ranked my top 5:

  • Bathroom Attendants (still pretty freshly annoyed from last night)
  • TSA Employees (seems like they all have a chip on their shoulder)
  • Car Salesman (just back off and let me look at the car, will ya?)
  • Telemarketers (no need to explain)
  • Tech support that can’t speak English (these guys make me want to punch something)

I intentionally left out politicians since that is an obvious one and by default nobody likes those imbeciles.  Did I miss any?

-Dave Q.

So yesterday as I was watching The Masters, I had to chuckle as I witnessed Tiger’s meltdown.  Usually, I don’t really care that much about golf.  Especially not enough to waste precious television time on it.  But I tuned in for the sole purpose of rooting against Tiger.  Did I root against him because of all the cheating he did on his wife?  No.  Anybody with that much fame and money would do the same.  So if that’s not the reason why I was rooting against Tiger, then what was?  This video answers that question:

The voice you hear is that of Earl Woods, Tiger’s father.  He died in 2006.  In the video, he is pretty much scolding Tiger.  Asking him if he learned anything.  Seriously?  You had to bring in your dead father to try to make yourself look good??  And Tiger with his pouty face.  Are we supposed to feel sorry for this guy?  Whatever, Tiger.  You officially suck.  And Nike can go to hell to for this crap.  Using a deceased man to try and save the golden boy.  Nice try.  I hope it doesn’t work.

Does anyone think there really is such a thing as sex addiction?  If so, I’m a sex addict.  I love sex, so I must be addicted to it, right?  I’m waiting for the day that one of these celebrity schmucks stands up and takes his lumps like a man instead of always blaming something else and going to rehab.  I’ll be waiting for a long time…

-Dave Q.

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Today's Deep Thought

  • I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out that I'd just quit my job and become a bum for a few years, because I was thinking about doing that anyway.