Archive for the ‘Bullshit’ Category

My mind is saying “yes”, but my body is saying “no”.

Let me start by saying I had an awesome time skiing!  I should have done it a loooong time ago.  I did a lot better than I thought, even with all the countless falls and humiliation from 8 year-olds skiing up to me and asking if I was ok.  Damn kids.  I will definitely go again the next time the opportunity presents itself.  It was fun and and made even better by the group of people on the trip.  Good times, good times…

That being said, my hip is effin’ killing me!  I don’t know what exactly I did to it, but it definitely happened on the slopes.  I was sore from a lot of places during the trip, but as aches and pains have subsided from muscles used that probably never had been, one pain lingers: my right hip.  It feels like something wants to pop every time I stand up from sitting down.  It’s not excruciating, but it’s a steady pain that Advil isn’t having much of an effect on.  So what would be the smart thing to do?  Probably rest it, right?  Nah.  What did smart guy do tonight?  I played volleyball like a dumb-ass.  WTF was I thinking???

All  that jumping from volleyball made the pain much worse.  How stupid was that?  Not the stupidest thing I’ve ever done, but it’s up there.  Easily in my top 20.   Anyway, I will be popping some more pain killers before bed and rubbing some Icy Hot in that area. Why Icy Hot you ask?  Because at this point, I’ll try anything.  I’m thinking that if I don’t show some improvement by Thursday, then maybe I’ll need to pay a visit to the doc.  And I avoid going to the doc as much as possible, so you know I’m not messing around.

Obviously, I’m not growing old gracefully.  Sadly, my ego is writing checks my body can’t cash.  I wonder how I would be feeling if this happened 10 years ago.  How fast would I bounce back?  Would I even miss a beat?  I’ll never know.  What I do know is that it hurts to put pants on.  Which makes me think that I should go pants-less this week.  Pants are overrated anyway…

-Dave Q.

If you are anything like me, you probably have a junk email account.  An account that you use for those situations that demand an email address but that you don’t really have much interest in what they send you.  Well, I was going through my junk email account when I came across this.

I participated in a garage sale a couple of weekends ago.  And to help generate some traffic, I posted the garage sale on Craigslist.  So a couple of days ago I came across this gem in the old junk mailbox.  Was I sure I had to sell my “garage sale”?  Yes.  I was.  God I hate spammers.  But I hate spammers even more when they don’t even try.  I’m sure the article you wanted me to read was very compelling, Larissa (if that is your real name), but instead of me clicking on that link, how about you go to hell instead?  Sound good?

So if any spammers would like to email someone dumb enough to ask me if I really want to sell my “garage sale”, please email “Larissa” at larissabchrd@gmail.com.  She would love to have some email sent her way.

-Dave Q.

Ever notice how infomercials are so negative?  I haven’t.  Because I won’t watch any.  And if a commercial comes on, I just tune it out.  Or maybe it’s more like I black out.   Either way, the message isn’t received.  Why do hate them?  Let’s see…

• The over-acting.
• The exaggerations.
• The crappy products.
• The poor video quality.
• The negativity.
• The scare tactics.

The video below pretty much sums it up.

So yeah, infomercials can go straight to hell.  But I’ll cut a little slack for the Shamwow guy.  Not because I will ever get a Shamwow (never say never, right?), but since I’ve been cooking a lot lately, I can really use a Slapchop.

-Dave Q.

Obviously, when I don’t blog, as I haven’t been lately, celebrities die.  And I apologize.  Especially to Billy Mays.  I really liked that guy.

As for this Michael Jackson stuff.  Wow.  I can’t believe there are that many people that adored him.  That are so broken up emotionally about this.  I am amazed at all the TV coverage.  I guess am the only one that remembers that he raped little boys?!?!

I don’t care what the judicial system said.  The dude was a child molester.  And I guess his music and cool dance moves are enough to make people look the other way.  Pathetic.  I’m just glad it isn’t just happening in America.  It looks like the world as a whole has their collective head up their ass when it comes to idolizing this pedophile.

I am gladly in the minority observing this crap.  It feels good not to drink the kool-aid.

-Dave Q.

PS:  Rest in peace Ed McMahon, Farah Fawcett, David Caradine.  And of course Billy Mays!

Early Friday morning (just happened to be Friday the 13th), a small pizza parlor near my neighborhood went up in flames.  A moment of silence for Pizza Italia please… 

Damn I loved the food there.  It was a place to hit after a softball game.  And I had them on speed dial when I wanted a pizza delivered.  Dominos and Pizza Hut can suck it.  Pizza Italia was some awesome stuff!  And they had the best damn wings, too.  (sigh)…

I hope they rebuild.  The damage was pretty extensive.  In some cases, a total loss was reported.  But I have faith that Pizza Italia will rise again.

On a side note, my roommate hated Pizza Italia.  It was too complex for him (his thing is a simple pepperoni pizza from Little Ceasar’s).  So I have to question where he was at approximately 4am last Friday.  And whether or not he had lighter fluid and matches on him.  I’m just saying.

-Dave Q.

If I had voted for Barack Obama, I would want to punch this guy in the mouth.  Makes all Obama supporters look… well… I would just be really pissed at this guy.

I’m not sure how the Secret Service could let this guy be in the same building with Barack Obama.  Did someone drop the ball here?  What a retard.

I bet the McDonald’s people are pissed.  That goes for normal people that work there and the owners of the company.  Way to represent, Julio!

-Dave Q.

First off, Happy MLK day!  Now, on with my misery…

I never used to have allergies as a kid.  Never.  I remember kind of laughing at all the allergy sufferers I would see.  Well, I’m not laughing anymore.  I am one of them now.  And I have no idea how it happened. Is that part of life?  Does your immune system start to break down in a way that it allows for allergies to slap you around?  I may have missed the memo on this.

What sucks is that I am a “warm weather” person.  I live in San Antonio, I was born in Hawaii, and my family is from Costa Rica.  Tropical, humid weather is in my blood.  So naturally I despise cold weather.  But this is where the conflict comes in.  If the weather stays cold, my allergies don’t seem so bad.  But when it hits about 65 degrees, then I am miserable.  Damn, this sucks.  My eyes are watering.  My throat is raw. I’m congested.  But, hey.  Who’s complaining?

And then there is the case of allergy medicine.  I can’t find one that works consistently.  Allegra is as effective as a Tic-Tac.  Claritin D?  No dice.  If you have any suggestions, please send them my way.  Or Kleenex.  Feel free to send Kleenex my way too.

-Dave Q.

Change, Shmange.

Come on, Barack.  Your whole platform was based on bringing change to Washington.  And then you do this??!?  You went and nominated Satan for Secretary of State?  Really?!?  I guess I’m just crazy to think that since all those questions about your judgement of character came up (Jeremiah Wright, Bill Ayers, the guy who was a professor and supported the PLO, etc.) that maybe you would pick someone with, I don’t know, some integrity? But instead you picked someone who stands for everything that is wrong in Washington.  Jeez.  I mean, I really want to give you a chance to prove to me that those that voted for you knew what they were doing,but it’s looking pretty bad right now.  So much for change.

I make no secret that I hate Hillary Clinton.  I can see right through her.  It’s like I have those special sunglasses from the movie They Live, where the guy puts them on and he can see who is an alien and who isn’t.  I know what that lady is.  Pure Evil.  So when Obama is trying to heal a country divided,I guess he has to start with a party divided, and appease all those Hillary lovers.  Hillary craves power like a fat kid craves gravy on his ice cream.  I can’t wait for your next great presidential decision, BHO.

Just when you think the monster is dead…

-Dave Q.